The college years can feel important and inconsequential all at once. Relationships feel all-consuming in the first eventful months of college, but many eventually fall to the wayside as other commitments take their place. In the revolving door of the average four-year institution, people come and go rather quickly. And yet, the impact of who we spend our time with can be life-changing.
What ought Christians look for as they make friends during their college years? Priscilla and Aquila, a wife and husband team featured in Acts and some New Testament letters, show us a pattern of friendship that can reap spiritual fruit in later years.
Look For Friends Who Challenge You
When Priscilla and Aquila meet Apollos, he boldly preaches Jesus and competently teaches the Scriptures (Acts 18:24–25). Even still, they realize something is off—he only knows of John the Baptist’s baptism, which looked forward to the coming Messiah. They pull him aside, explaining to him that believers are no longer waiting for the Messiah. He has come! Jesus is who he says he is.
What a beautiful picture of friends who are eager to speak the truth in love to one another (Eph. 4:15). Imagine if Priscilla and Aquila loudly interrupted Apollos’ teaching to correct him. Instead, showing self-restraint and Christian love toward their brother, they pull him aside for a private conversation. Apollos’ ministry greatly benefitted from their boldness.
We need good friends who will pull us aside and courageously speak the truth of Scripture to us. We need friends who love us enough to challenge us. As iron sharpens iron, we need friends who sharpen us according to God’s truth (Prov. 27:17).
Whether you’re on a Christian or a secular college campus, you need friends whose challenging words and advice come from Scripture. As you strive to be that friend to others, you can surround yourself with those who evidence that Jesus is who he says he is.
Look For Friends Who Strengthen Your Faith
My favorite part about the friendship of Apollos, Priscilla, and Aquila is that when Apollos leaves, he “takes” his friends with him. Apollos crosses over to Achaia and continues to boldly preach the Scriptures—but there’s a difference in his preaching. He now shows by the Scriptures that the Christ is Jesus (Acts 18:28). The theme of his preaching is “Jesus has come!”
We reflect the friends we spend the most time around. Are your friends serving in their local church, eager to worship God, and passionate about Scripture? Stick with them and allow their fervor to fan your faith into flames. As Proverbs reminds us, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise” (Prov. 13:20).
Are your closest friends disinterested in faith, believing they’ll have time for God later on in life? Beware.
Good friends leave your faith stronger than when they met you. The theme of their lives is “Jesus has come!” They live every day like this is true and will remind you when you forget.
You’ll leave your college campus behind you, but your friends’ influence can profoundly shape the years ahead.
Look For Friends Who Stick Through Hard Seasons
I always wonder what it might have been like to stand in Corinth, watching Paul make his tents, chat with his friends, and preach the gospel to passersby (Acts 18:3). If I happened to stop, if I waited and watched, perhaps I would have witnessed the beginning of another important friendship.
New to the city, Priscilla and Aquila meet Paul and allow him to stay in their home—they share the same trade (tentmaking), the same faith, and the same house for some time. Eventually, these friends separated to pursue the work God called them to—Paul’s own journeys being perilous and strained.
Still, the friendship remained. When Priscilla and Aquila are in Rome, Paul sends them greetings, speaking highly of them to his readers (Rom. 16:3–4). And in what is sometimes believed to be the last epistle Paul wrote, he greets his friends again, in what could have been a purposeful, final goodbye (2 Tim. 4:19). This friendship stood the test of time.
There is no telling what each season of life will bring, or what difficult providences God may have in store for you during your college years. Who can encourage you to keep growing in your faith and remind you to rest in God’s promises when life’s changes seem overwhelming?
Good, godly friends can.
Life In Community
Did you know that God’s very first declaration of “not good” in the creation account was Adam’s human isolation? He remedied this problem by providing a human companion fit for Adam—a partner and friend (Gen. 2:18). Someone complementary. Someone who could enjoy God and life alongside the first man.
Christian friendships invite us into the full life God designed for us from the beginning. And they can begin in the college years, whether with your classmates or with Christians at your church!
My first roommates in college are still my closest friends. From states away, we share parenting mishaps and church updates. We’ve cried together and exchanged apologies. We watch each other grow and cheer each other on.
The best part of our friendship? Our foundation is built on our shared faith. Over the years, we’ve challenged and strengthened each other. We’ve lived some of the most important years of our lives together. The Christian life isn’t meant to be lived alone. Plant the seeds of good friendships now and reap their fruit for years to come.
