After three decades as a victim of domestic violence, I was broken, disoriented, and confused about how God fit into my distorted picture of spirituality. How could anyone heal after so many years of living in survival mode? More importantly, how did the gospel intersect with my experience of trauma?
Is Trauma “Normal”?
Trauma is pervasive. Studies vary widely, but it’s estimated that 50-70% of us are significantly impacted by at least one traumatic episode. Whether our experience was singular or a series of events over time, trauma produces lasting adverse effects on an individual's functioning and mental, physical, social, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
The experience of trauma is a result of the fall: we were not created to know evil. But now that sin has entered the world, bad things happen that cause great suffering. Trauma occurs when our suffering overwhelms our ability to cope. Though a survivor may need many tools to learn strategies for living with the effects of trauma, in my life and practice, I’ve found but one solution that offers lasting hope, peace, and freedom: the gospel of Jesus Christ. By his substitutionary death on the cross, Jesus suffered far more than we ever could. He relates to us in our trauma (Heb. 4:15–16). He works in and through our suffering to grow us in endurance, character, and hope, drawing us into a deeper understanding and awareness of his love for us (Rom. 5:3–5).
Why We Need Transformation
Despite what we may know is true in Christ, our identities and how we view the world are shaped by our environment, experiences, cultural influences, memories, and relationships. When trauma weighs heavily into our personal narrative, it often results in shame, depression, anxiety, hopelessness, and feelings of isolation.
Quite literally, our brains conform—or develop patterns of thought, belief, and action—based on these personal stories. Without conscious effort, we relive our trauma by reinforcing the beliefs it caused. For example, if you were neglected or rejected as a child, you probably formed a (false) belief that you are worthless. This belief might have provoked you to act out: looking for love in all the wrong places; cutting or engaging in other self-harm to relieve the pain; self-sabotaging opportunities for success; rejecting others or their love; numbing with the use of alcohol or drugs; or using rage and anger as a cover for fear of abandonment or insecurity. Conversely, you might deny the harm it caused you, blame others for your problems, minimize your pain, or rationalize the actions of the person responsible.
How Is Transformation Possible?
Scripture offers tremendous hope for those who feel trapped in harmful patterns of thinking and living: "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect" (Rom. 12:2, emphasis added). Our amazing minds are renewable! That is, new neural pathways develop as the Holy Spirit guides us into truth (John 16:13). As we look to the Scriptures, we can affirm what God says about us: nothing can separate us from his love (Rom. 8:35-39); God rejoices over us (Zeph. 3:17); God has good plans for us amidst suffering (Jer. 29:11). We can know the truth which sets us free (John 8:32); we can learn wisdom from God (James 1:5); we can develop positive, healthy habits and relationships (1 John 1:7). Through Christ’s work at the cross, God has delivered us from darkness into the kingdom of light (Col. 1:13), and he is at work in us through his word and by his Spirit, renewing us day by day (2 Cor. 4:16; Titus 3:5).
How Transformation Works
In my personal process of transformation, God sent me specific help at appropriate times to grow my faith and renew my mind. A compassionate, trauma-informed pastor listened to my story and let me grieve; he kindly pointed out the differences between my distorted beliefs (God is against me) and what God is really like (he is for me: Rom. 8:31). God sent other women into my life who shared similar experiences and were also seeking truth during their recovery, so I did not feel isolated and alone. Corporate worship during church suddenly meant something much deeper: Christ had rescued me, had invited me into his story, and I shared in his glory! The Lord’s Supper was a fresh reminder of my union with Christ. God had made a way of escape from the patterns of my past (1 Cor. 10:13) and was transforming me from the inside out.
Though there’s no formula for how God brings about healing, for those with whom I walk in their personal stories of renewal, I offer these practical suggestions:
- Re-engage with Scripture. In addition to sitting under the preached word each week, take time daily to read a Psalm or a chapter from the Gospels. Receiving truth and pouring it over yourself by interacting with God’s word is crucial for refuting distortions and tearing down lies (2 Cor. 10:4-5). Pray for clarity as you ask questions like, What is God like? How does Jesus treat people? What is this saying to me?
- Pursue your own healing. Care for yourself as you would for a loved one by getting enough rest, eating nutritious food, moving your body, and spending time with encouraging people. Allow yourself space to grieve losses that occurred due to your trauma; God is making room for a new thing, preparing the way forward (Isa. 43:19)! If necessary, don’t be afraid to seek the help of medical or psychological professionals to support and guide you in this process.
- Invest in your growth. Since trauma is often rooted in disordered relationships, learn what healthy relationships should look like. The book of Proverbs instructs us in wisdom by identifying characteristics of helpful and unhelpful people, starting with you and extending to your relationships.
- Do something creative. Creativity stimulates positive neural pathways, releases helpful hormones, and reflects God’s character. Whether it’s music, gardening, photography, writing, crafting, quilting, or underwater basket weaving, engage in an activity you love.
- Share your struggle with others. God created us for relationships; a small group of empathetic people can be a means of grace in your healing. If you are yet unable to engage at this level, sharing with one trusted friend at a time will help you know you're not alone. Ask for prayer as God transforms your heart and share what you’re learning on your journey.
- Celebrate milestones. When you see yourself replacing old thought patterns with new ones, celebrate this evidence of God’s grace in your life! Share it with a friend, thank God and give him glory for helping you, and rest in the comfort of knowing that you’re growing!
The experience of trauma is one of suffering beyond words, and yet, God is at work redeeming and renewing us for our growth and for his glory. The more I see good stem from the outcome of my trauma, the more grateful I am for Jesus’s gospel, and the more my heart aligns with God’s purposes for my life and story.
Though healing may continue to be a process on this side of eternity, we can look to Christ and behold his glory, trusting that we “are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit” (2 Cor. 3:18).
